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Valentine’s Day Hunt: Ten Types To Snatch Up

By Sean Charles
Published February 1, 2018

We scouted the globe to find your lonely-night Valentine imaginary boyfriend.

Cue the hearts, cue the chocolates, cue the Grindr XTRA upgrade. Who are we kidding? You know us single queens need to ensure we get those messages. February has officially arrived and all you single Mary’s out there are dreading the inevitable: Valentine’s Day. This only means the hunt for that special one, two or three is on.

Trouples are a thing now which probably explains why the dating ratio has completely taken a turn for the worst. Being single has now reached an apocalyptic extreme, and in Trump’s America dating in the gay world is a form of resistance. It’s our duty to flock the bars, grocery stores, or gyms (well at least the steam rooms) to meet the men. Who knows, maybe we’ll even snatch some eye candy, take a selfie with him and send Pence a postcard from Palm Springs (or maybe somewhere in Indiana just to be extra).

With that rant being out in the world, we have to clock that we are mere days away from Valentine’s day. Let the hunt hit full throttle.

Certainly no one wants to be alone on Valentine’s day, and I myself have spent it many a times in bed with Meryl Streep (Netflix and chill, but really chill that is) and not that I’m complaining about that. But this year would be nice to invite someone new to my love nest, again thinking in threes. Me, a man and Meryl.

So, we (well, me) at Drag Star Diva, in order to narrow down the hunt, have put together a menu of shorts, in the hopes that this year you will place that order, honey, and get yours. Happy shopping.

THE CEO

Forever Mogul

Brian Chesky: CEO of AirBNB. If only every AirBNB host could look like Brian. Those eyes just say Power…. (HEE HEE)

 

THE HIPSTER

Cybele Malinowski

Jason Momoa: Aquaman himself, I mean his instagram is called PrideOf Gypsies, the Esmerelda  fantasy is alive and SOOOO real. I would not mind being handled by a tourquise ringed stud. Off to Trader Joe’s I go.

 

THE JOCK 

Getty

Julian Edelman: Wide Receiver for the New England Patriots, Push em’ back Push em’ Back, we hope our Jock pick has a good game this weekend, short of big deal.

THE LEATHER DADDY 

Clash Magazine

Nick Joanas: Why are you so good to us Nick Jonas? We are just saying if he looks like this now imagine when he actually gets to Dad status.  [Thanks dad.]

THE SWEETHEART

 

Getty

Michael B. Jordan: Sweetheart of all sweethearts, I mean that smile though. Ummm “Mom I’m bringing someone to thanksgiving dinner”

THE QUEEN

VH1

MDNA Cosmetics

 

MILK: Drag Race All Star, I mean get you a man who can do both. Lets have a Kai Kai  #TEAMMILK

 

THE PRINCESS

INSTA: MannyMUA

 

MANNY MUA: Make-up artist of the WURRRRL…. Can you say peaches, henny? We all love a good make-up-yet-scruffy Princess every now and then…more now than ever. Hey kitty girl, we see that highlight on dem’ cheeks.

 

THE NERD

Getty

Andrew Garfield: I mean look at that face <3

 

THE GYM RAT

Dwayne Johnson: I really don’t think that Frenchie realizes how lucky it is.

 

THE HUSBAND

Getty

Alex Rodriguez: Our Sister JLO seems to have snatched this one, He just looks like a husband doesnt he, I mean we know he has been divorced but I mean, I still want to introduce him to the family and perhaps take a trip to Cartier.

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